Book Review: Once Upon A Time In The West… Country by Tony Hawks

The countryside is fabulous.

It’s full of nature, it’s mostly a peaceful, quiet and tranquil place, but most of all it’s not full of buildings. It has some buildings obviously, but it doesn’t have a huge concentration of them.

Also, living in the country means that you’re allowed to wear green waxed jackets, blue quilted coats and have wellington boots as your primary footwear. People in the country find it necessary to wear these items of clothing because they spend a good portion of their time outdoors.

£275 million for my foot?

What has happened in the news this week? There was possibly something about many men and women squabbling over who was the best at politics, but I may be wrong. What I am certain about though, is that a man made the headlines for not selling something.

Who owns a forest? (And can I have it please?)

Excuse me, do you know if Robin Hood lives around here?

Houses. Where would we be without houses? Everyone likes a house, especially homeless people who don’t have one. You always want what you can’t have, like a full plate of food in one of those overpriced upmarket restaurants that serve portions of food that wouldn’t satisfy the hunger of a two year old child. Or those orange and cherry sherbert double-dips with the swizzle stick – where have they gone? And didn’t they sometimes come with an extra special third flavour of cola sherbert?