Mecha this happen for Tokyo 2020 please

In some not very exciting news, a shortlist for the mascot of the Tokyo 2020 Olympic and Paralympic games has recently been revealed. This is not much interest to anyone, anywhere, apart from Japanese schoolchildren, who have been charged with the monumental task of choosing from one of three designs, which, when chosen, will either be loved for all eternity or, more probably, be instantly forgotten by the rest of the world’s population.

I have inspected each design [and you can too if you click here], and after greatly studying them for at least a few seconds each, I can report that they all look fairly similar, and therefore, it doesn’t really matter which is selected. But for the record, the final mascots could be either: A) two white, vaguely humanoid things, covered in blue and pink squares; B) a flaming cat-fox hybrid and a blue dog with wind; C) a sausage limbed white fox and a racoon that likes to wear a leaf on its head.

A brilliant new discovery: it’s called archery

This year, due to other life commitments, I had decided that the Olympics could pass me by. I’d keep up to date with what happened via news bulletins or perhaps just watch a few highlights programmes. This avoidance tactic would therefore leave my evenings largely free to make house or garden improvements. And that is exactly what happened.

Until the archery started.